It has been a long and painful journey for me - surprisingly. I had not expected this. I thought I had already prepared - at least mentally - for this journey that has thrown itself face first into me. Really, you would have thought that I've seen this coming; but I didn't.

Cancer. Many people feared this name. It even came down to have even having their own nickname: The Big C.

Thyroid Cancer. Most people - or doctors - say that I'm pretty much lucky to have this "good cancer". And you know what? I think that was what triggered me into being so laid-back about the whole issue: me being the lucky patient with only the Good Cancer - or should I say, The Good Big C?
But in the end, I was left being totally wiped out in this journey down Recovery Road. Even with that, I still try and reason myself out when I was struggling with the pain and tiredness, that I was pretty lucky - which in other words, I pretty much am.

But back to the point; while searching for an appropriate picture to put up here, in this particular post, I stumbled into something... Mind opening, to say the least.

This, made me realize that I have been pretty much stupid all these times. Well, I'm still fighting in comparison with what s/he mentioned in the picture but I'm getting there.
Yes, I did felt like giving up in one of those times I was still stuck in that white-washed room but the fact is that I'm here; I'm still here, fighting my all; I have suffered too.

I had forgotten one of my most treasured mindsets of all:
as little as your problem is, the fact is that the problem is still there no matter how much you belittle it or how much you ignore it's presence for other much bigger problem. Like, for example you're getting down with the flu. You ignore your state thinking of other people down in Africa or something.

This is debatable, I know. Some people would actually want everyone to be this way, saying that otherwise you are selfish, only thinking about yourself. But let me tell you, will by ignoring the state you're in, will that help those people in Africa? of course not. I know by taking care of yourself doesn't help them either but think of it this way: you will never be able to care for others if you don't care yourself. The fact that you are sick is still there.

Debatable, I know. But it all comes down to how you see and how you approach something.

I'm getting out of topic but nyeh, to be honest, my mind is not completely here. No, I am not high nor drunk, you assholes. But well, not in that kind of state, I am just a bit woozy from the meds I just took.

I've been out of school for almost 2 weeks now. My trip to Singapore is next week. Great, another week to miss. If I didn't pretty much need the rest, I'd go to school but I know my body's strength when I feel it. and I know that they still need work.

Sigh.

bye. OLD | NEW
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